I was thinking about myself yesterday. I mean, I think to myself all the time (duh), but I was actually thinking about myself and my history as far as relationships go. I've exclusively dated women for the past six years. Before that, there were a few guys on the radar. But after 2003, it's like they dropped off the face of my world. lol. No offense to men but y'all became lightweight irrelevant to me.
Sometimes it boggles my mind how things work, especially when it comes to sexuality. I'm the first to say that sexuality is fluid and complicated, but once you've figured yourself out and you're secure in it, it shouldn't be complex at all to you. (Maybe to everyone else but who cares?) So yeah, yesterday I got to thinking about how smoothly I made that switch over to being comfortable and happy dating & being sexually active with women only. I haven't had any withdrawl smptoms, any cravings or flashbacks, no shoulda coulda wouldas, nothing. And Im so happy about that. That's why im an advocate of trying it all out early on to see what suits you best. Because once you find it, you'll know and you won't have to deal with being flip floppy. (y'all know how I feel about fickle sometimey any way the wind blow lesbians)
But just for the hell of it, yesterday while I was out & about, I took notice of this guy. He was cute. Very cute actually. Chanel via 2000 woulda been delighted with him. lol. Now, I'm happily wifed up (Hi Baby!!:-) so I didnt wanna make anything obvious to him that I was tryin to check him out because I didn't wanna have to burst his bubble and tell him I was taken. So I was trying to be discrete. He had a great physique. Tall, toned, well dressed. He was attractive. I wanted to see if I could feel NOW what I felt yrs ago for the opposite sex.
You know how it is when you see someone physically attractive who really catches your attention...a light tingle runs down your spine all of a sudden, makes you take notice like mmmm. Your eyes tattle-tell on you as they roam to whichever places on the body or face that fascinate you the most. That slight smile teases across your lips as your mind begins to wander, tip toeing that fine line of lust...
Y'all know what i'm talking about.
Yeah um, it didn't happen for me yesterday. At all. lol. I saw him, noted that he was cute, tried to see if i felt anything extra and...nada. It's honestly just not there. No spark or kismet whatsoever for men anymore. Its kinda trippy! Like how does that happen? Did a part of my brain shut down? Or maybe a part of my soul woke up....
I don't know. It's just different with women. So different. And men...yeah you guys are still pretty much irrelevant to me. Sorry!