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Keep in mind that this blog is devoted to all things GAY. That means any news, advice, entertainment, literature, reviews, jokes,polls, etc will be completely curved. I might give it to you with no chaser but it definitely wont be STRAIGHT!

Friday, December 10, 2010

Raising kids in a homophobic society

I grew into my maternal instincts rather late. While old classmates were having babies in their early 20's, I was like ummmm negative. I have too much to do and no time to be shackled by bottles and bibs. I knew I wanted kids, just not when I was 21. But now, I'm 27, and my ovaries are staging a protest. I feel them. Holding little signs, chanting WE WANT BABIES AND WE WANT EM NOW! *sigh*

I guess it is about that time. Approaching 30, just about done with undergrad, on my way to grad school, a lot more mentally stable than I was in my early 20's THANK baby JESUS. So yeah. I want a few little mini-me's. Note: a few. Not a litter. I think I've grown into good mommy material and I know the person I want to have children with is about the most amazing person with kids ever. So we are good on that front. My main concern [outside of trying to explain the process of invitro and surrogacy to my parents] is raising children in this crazy ass world. *triple sigh*

It's hard enough to raise children in a heterosexual home. But for two women, or two men, having a family takes on a whole different slant and it's extremely unfortunate. Behind closed doors, I believe families with same-sex parents can be just as functional or dysfunctional as a family with a mother and a father. If the parents have a strong and healthy bond and know what the hell they are doing, then the children will be raised with as much love and care as any other family. But outside of the walls of the home is where trouble arises. People, adults and other children alike, can be so cruel and ignorant. I can see people's faces now as myself and my partner walk into PTA meetings (I will be at every single one). I can already hear the whispers "are they...no, they aren't...oh my god they are!" smh. I could give a rats ass about the talk personally because I am very good at defending myself. It's my children that I worry about. I can excuse light ridicule from other children towards my kids, because kids will be kids, as long as it doesn't get out of hand. BUT the first time an adult says something ignorant to my babies...i'm goin to jail. I know it. I'm starting my bail money fund next month.

Note to the homophobes of the world: mess with my babies and you get all kinds of f'd up. I'm jus sayin.

I just wish the world was more..I don't know...I hate the word tolerant because I don't feel like i'm doin' anything that needs tolerance. I'm living my life. I just want everyone else to do the same and mind their own business.

Guess I need to prep myself and stock up on blood pressure medication.

On my way to open up a paypal account for that bail fund.....

5 comments:

KayBee said...

I've been wanting kids since I was a kid; it's always been my dream to have a family. I remember last year (I think it was during the summer?) when I had only came out to few select people in my family. My aunt (one of the people I used to look up to the most) said something about how gays shouldn't have kids because it "f**ks them up and causes all kinds of psychological problems in children" because they are being subjected to the "atrocities of homosexuality"...I decided not come out to her that day, and I've been on the fence about whether I should have kids or not ever since...

Chanel said...

I totally understand the fear. My family, especially on my dad's side, are going to need a LOT of fireside chats to get them even halfway comfortable with the idea of my gf and i starting a family. Im not looking forward to it. But, at this point, I feel like i need to live my life. I want children and that is that. The family who loves me unconditionally will be the ones lucky enough to be around and help nurture my little ones. The family who judge me, don't need to be around my kids anyway.

Toni said...

Don't worry, u already know I'm not worried about no pills or bail money, anybody messes with ANY child that has ANYthing to do with me and they will regret it for the rest of their life, and ESPECIALLY if the child is mine!

And to KayBee, don't let ANYbody take the joy that comes along from being completely out and being a mother from you, including family! In life we all come to learn that eventually we have to start living for ourselves and if raising a family is wut you desire, then find you an equally prepared woman and go @ it!

Chanel said...

:-) @ Toni

Foxy Brown said...

i tell sweet all the time, i am ready to go to jail for my kid. i will f**k somebody up with no regrets. i'm not having it. as far as my family goes, i wish one of dem ninjas would say something side-ways. if they can pop out babies by different folk every other year, i can have a baby with my WIFE. f**k dat!